How To Survive Holiday Parties When You Have Social Anxiety

It's difficult to socialize when you have social anxiety, however during holiday seasons it's practically expected of you to socialize with your family and friends. If you were able to avoid parties during the most part of the year, it's practically impossible to do it during holiday season. You are more or less forced to attend family gatherings and enjoy their company even though you would rather be by yourself.

Since it's almost impossible to avoid festive gatherings, I have decided to give you a few tips on how to survive holiday parties when you have social anxiety.

FIRST OF ALL, TRY NOT TO AVOID GOING TO PARTIES ALTOGETHER.

I know that's hard but you have to go. When you avoid a party it makes you feel like you have avoided getting anxious, but in the long run, your anxiety only gets worse. It's like a downward spiral. The more you avoid social gatherings, the harder it gets the next time you have to attend one.

Of course, it isn't easy to walk into the party with confidence if you have social phobia, but it really gets so much easier over time. Every time you attend a party, you gain new social skills that will help you feel more confident the next time.

TRY NOT TO FIGHT YOUR ANXIETY AT A PARTY

If you focus on your anxiety, you will only get more anxious. Instead, try to accept your feelings and change your focus on something else. My advice would be to change your focus on other people.

When you put your whole attention on others, you somehow forget about your anxiety. And there's one more benefit of this. When you concentrate on others you can actually "hear" what they want to tell you. You are not preoccupied with your own thoughts and what you're going to say. You simply listen to what they have to say and respond afterwards. Try it and you'll see how much easier it gets to have meaningful conversations without awkward pauses.

HOW TO HAVE MEANINGFUL CONVERSATIONS

Here are a few more tips on how to have meaningful conversations.

* BE APPROACHABLE AND OPEN TO CONVERSATION. When we are anxious we try to make ourselves invisible to others and they can notice that. But I want you to try something new. Make yourself approachable. Smile and make eye contact. You'll notice how they will loosen up and help you feel good around them.
* JOIN AN ONGOING CONVERSATION. When a group is discussing a topic that interests you, join the conversation. Contribute to the conversation by expressing your opinion about the topic. Ask questions to find out what others think about it. If you start slowly by joining conversation that are interesting to you, you'll gain some necessary social skills that will make it easier for you to join conversations that are not about something you are interested in in the first place.
* BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER. Listen to what others have to say. Look for clues that will show you how much they love a certain topic. If you pay close attention you'll notice how people change their facial expressions and the way they speak when they talk about something they love. Once you know what they love, you can ask them even more questions on that topic. You'll make them feel good which is exactly what these festive gatherings are for. As a result, they'll feel the need to make you feel good about yourself as well.

If you follow my advice, you will eventually begin to enjoy holiday parties. The skills you'll learn will also help you later on in life when you'll get invited to other parties and social gatherings.

I hope you you'll follow my advice and try it out yourself. I'd be glad if you let me know how it went.

Credit: pualib.blogspot.com