SECRET NO. 3: EMBRACING EACH OTHERS IMPERFECTIONS
I am sure many of you who are based in Singapore would remember this TV ad - Beautifully Imperfect. If you cannot remember it, you can watch it here.
Many people go into marriage thinking everything will be perfect. Sometimes, I think it is bad that we try to make our wedding perfect. After such perfection, some people go into their marriage having an expectation that everything will be perfect and their marriage will be a bed of roses. But since we are humans, we can never be perfect. If two imperfect people come together, there are sure to be some imperfections along the way.
I love this story that my friend told me about her friend X. So what happened was, X kept trying to change her husband. Her husband had a bad habit of discarding his clothes on the floor after he takes them off. And this would really annoy her a lot. And they will end up quarreling. So after years of trying to change her husband, she finally decided to change herself. She decided to accept her husband for he is, and discarding his clothes on the floor is something that he will always do. It does not mean that he is a bad husband or a bad father. I thought that was pretty hilarious I first heard this story, or maybe it was because my friend was a really animated storyteller. As extreme as this story might sound, sometimes it is just as simple as that.
Sometimes, we just need to embrace our partners imperfections.
Back to me. I have so many flaws. I think if I were to write them all down, its going to take up too much space. And my hubby Jamie too has his little imperfections which I dont think would be nice for me to reveal in public space. The way we have been able to live harmoniously, at least 90% of the time is to embrace these imperfections, and these imperfections will even grow on us.
Ok, I will let you in on a little secret. I drool when I sleep. YES, I DO! Some of you might be thinking "EEEKKKSS!" I know, I know I wish I could find a way to stop this. But apparently, it has to do with the structure of my mouth. Anyway, Jamie can either complain about how my drool is all over the pillows, or he could create a cute little pet name for me based on this imperfection. I am sure you can guess what he did.
So here you have it, my 3 little secrets to a happy marriage:
1. Choosing the Right Mate
2. Agreeing on Money Matters Early
3. Embracing Each Others Imperfections
If you are married, what are you own little secrets? Do share them with us! Share on Facebook
VIOLET LIM
VIOLET LIM is a real-life modern matchmaker who has founded Asia's leading lunch dating company Lunch Actually (www.lunchactually.com). Violet is the bestselling author of the dating book 'Lessons From 15,000 First Dates'. She is also an acknowledged dating and relationship expert who has been featured on more than 1000 media coverage including ABC News 20/20, Bloomberg, CNBC Asia, CNN Go, Channel News Asia, USA Today, TV Tokyo and Singapore's National Day Video 2005 as one of Singapore's most aspiring people. Violet is happily married to her university sweetheart Jamie and they have two young children.
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